go with the flow.

Tuesday, January 30, 2007

A Quick One

I find it extremely amusing when irritating people begin to annoy irritating people. It gets really interesting and they don't know it!

The weather's been really cold in the past couple of days. And my immunity has really gone down. The sore throat's getting better but I've got a cough and the occasional cold. This feeling sucks.

Sunday, January 28, 2007

The World Is Changing

There is a huge cause for concern if you find yourself cupping your mouth in disbelief, eyes wide open and your entire self reclining on your armchair, trying to distance yourself from the computer screen as much as possible. Well, that was what happened to me a few minutes ago, all because I chanced upon this blog which was quite revolting.

Okay, I know, I am being evil.

Anyways, why is the world changing? For one, people are blogging about some really weirdass things that I just can't get over with. I can't believe he actually has these tendencies, to blog about some love interest that prolly won't ever be his anyways.

Okay, I know, I am being evil again.

Oh and the world is also changing because I have the sudden love for salads and veggies and juicy fresh raw fibre-rich things that you might classify under rabbit food! We had a sumptuous salad with blue cheese dressing for lunch, along with Alfredo spaghetti, which was damn good also.

And I absolutely love kidney beans. They make me happier!

Alrightey, enough of my ramblings and more (unglam) pictures for you to enjoy!

At n.y.d.c.

More shots from my birthday celebration last Sunday

...and Karen's very unglam mug.
Enjoy!

As It Is

I guess I never really moved on.

It's this way because of my past actions. I can't pluck up my courage to tell you what I really want to.

Thursday, January 25, 2007

Say Hello and Smile

Okay, the title is completely irrelevant.
I thought I'd post up some really nice birthday photos from last Sunday.
(: Black and white looks really good because its able to hide flaws.
Ah it's such a pity I can't go back to Dunman for the choir ice-cream party tomorrow. I'm missing singing like, hell lot.

Everthing's Acting Up

Annoying people should just die. And like perish from the face of the earth forever and ever. I know I'm sounding all immature and superficial, but seriously, something has to be done.

I dislike group work. It makes my head spin and I've to bear with the shit all the time. At age 17, I am selfish and individualistic. I do not enjoy the idea of building teamwork and shit.

Why is the internet connection like that? Why are the messages I send to my friends on msn distorted? Are they still fixing those bloody undersea cables near Taiwan?

Dell designs their usb 'holes' (where you put in your thumbdrive) at very inconvenient spots on the cpu. Everytime I need to insert my thumbdrive/cable into the cpu, I have to crouch down in a very awkward frog-like position and attempt to insert the thing gently and correctly while trying to hold the position. Most of the time I fail on my first try and I result to having to go down on my elbows to get it in.

My throat is getting sorer and sorer by the minute. It's getting really painful and I think I am going to die soon because my Geog teacher mentioned in class today that a 10-year-old died in Europe from a new strain of mutated virus. And she started off with a sore throat.

Lucky the muscle cramps and the splitting headache went away, so I won't have to spend another two bullets bitching about them.

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

The Actual Birthday

My classmates threw a mini-party for the January babies on my birthday. Glendon and Yong En's birthdays were last Saturday, so we shared a cake on Monday. They sang a birthday song each for us in the canteen, so thanks guys!

And I was a Ngee Ann boy on my birthday too! I swopped uniforms with Glendon and people had varying reactions about me in the blue uniform. But I really quite like the uniform lah, it's like blue, and it's so thin and comfortable to wear, and the pants don't have any pleats, so it's so much different from Dunman's uniform. Well, at least Glendon and I agreed that pleated pants make you look like you have a damn odd-shaped erection whenever you sit down!

That night, I had dinner with the family at this French dining place called Andre. Its this charming little shophouse restaurant along Telok Ayer Street, and its interiors are like really cosy and warm. We had this whole four course thing and it was damn good lah. For mains I had veal shank and it was like heaven! (Check out that huge erectile thing on my plate! It's really a lot!) Being the glutton that I am, I managed to wolf down everything and I really did enjoy the food tremendously.

The manager there said I was like the 7th 'Andre' he met in the restaurant, and he was glad to hear that it was my birthday that day. For desserts, the manager and this other waiter served my original tiramisu with a candle and they sang for me! And the restaurant is like kinda small and everyone suddenly turned silent when my family and them(the staff) started to break into song.
I was really happy. (:

That night I went back and checked my cca allocation and I discovered that I was accepted into floorball! So I did alright in the trials in the end! Yay! That's like, such a good birthday present from Meridian.

Yep, so I am 17 now and I am loving how the year has kicked off so far. It's been wonderful getting to experience new things and being able to meet new people in Meridian. I'm looking forward to even more enjoyable times ahead this year, and something tells me it's gonna be a blast!

My 17th Birthday Celebration

My birthday was on Monday, but I celebrated it on Sunday with my friends (:

I had lunch with Jia Yu, Inez and Hidayah at New York New York and it was great just catching up with them. Shing Chun was missing though, and it was because he had swimming lesson. Which, I think, is really funny actually. And the three of them gave me a little teddy and a mug! The food was good, and it really filled us up, so we spent a lot of time sitting there after eating and just talking.

After that I was supposed to meet Prasanna and the rest at City Hall, but I received a message from them which told me to find this clue in some cash deposit place at the atm. I knew straight away that I was supposed to do this whole amazing race thingy to get to them! And I started to panic because I really couldn't find the clue that they wanted me to find. And half the time I was afraid that the people might find me suspicious and sneaky.

And then I finally found the clue in some brochure box thingy, which told me to go to this place with a lot of fruits. Some of the fruits listed were Wantingfruit, Prasannana, Karengan, Edwinwi etc. and I kept laughing to myself along the way. So yeah, lucky this one was easier, and I knew I had to make my way to Orchard Road. Once there, I was supposed to like find the clue which was on the Today newspaper stand but I didn't know and I ended up walking all the way down to Taka lah. So I walked back and then next I went to Wheelock, where I was wandering around looking for the next clue because I was really lost already. I ended up strolling past n.y.d.c. and I caught sight of Wan Ting's ~~big~~ head and the others as well! So the last bit of the amazing race didn't quite work out in the end.

I didn't quite eat at n.y.d.c. I tried the Spud-niks. Prasanna had Destiny's Child. Wan Ting had Lala Croft salad. I find the names a tad too imaginative, haha.

I'm not gonna post up too many pictures, because we really took tonnes of 'em. As usual, the camwhores in us emerged and we couldn't resist it anyway. And it was really hilarious, because we kept laughing at things that were going on around us, and that Wan Ting had a thing for the waiter, lol. But yeah, I laughed till my insides hurt quite a bit.

Look! I've got a new bag (: And I'm super happy, because I really want this! YAY.

After that we went to take neoprints, in hope of reliving the fond secondary school (tampines mall) days. Prasanna and I were dancing away to some japanese pop song that was playing while they were taking forever to decorate the neoprints. Any idea if I can load the video up for y'all to see? Our routine was like, spot on, considering that we took only 10 seconds to plan our moves.

And then we went home, and throughout the entire mrt ride, we were taking twit photos. Haha. It was really interesting, to put ourselves in twits' shoes and do what they're best at - camwhoring with super actsy-cutesy poses and damn strange face contortions. I frankly think we're super deprived beings lah, considering that we indulge in these weird things.

So that was kinda like how I celebrated my birthday... I really had a great time and I'm glad I got to celebrate it with all my closest friends! Love y'all (:

Sunday, January 21, 2007

Last Night

I didn't get to go out in the end yesterday. I was all dressed up and ready to go when everything suddenly happened so quickly, I didn't even have time to think. One thing led to another, and the entire issue blew up into such a huge problem. I did try to walk away from everything, but then I couldn't. Everyone was screaming at everyone, and it was just really bad at home lah. But at least its over now, and we're not going to hurt each other anymore.

Sigh. Sometimes I wished I lived alone.

Saturday, January 20, 2007

Void

It's an extremely lonely Saturday afternoon. Somehow I'm feeling quite void today. I just can't wait to go out later, because I'll be spending the night out and coming home tomorrow morning. I've spent the entire day working on my Economics tutorial, and last night finishing up my Maths tutorial, but I still have that Chinese essay to complete by Monday. Raaah.

The total number of hours I've slept yesterday and today is 12 hours. That's half a day for you. And that's how tired I was for the entire week.

I am not really looking forward to my birthday on Monday though. Something tells me it'd be a long and tiring day, especially since the last period, which is PE, ends at 3:25pm.

But I am sure looking forward to my birthday celebration on Sunday. I hope there are plenty of nice surprises for me to uncover tomorrow. And I also can't wait to dine at Andre's on Monday with the family. More of that when Monday eventually comes (:

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Stop At Two Policy

I've come to this realisation that having too many siblings might not necessarily be good at all. The more the merrier is a lie. The person who came up with it is a liar.

Let me raise an extremely good example. My dad has five other brothers, he's the third in line, and even at this age, they still have petty squabbles over the phone. Actually, the one and only issue they have and they disagree to is that of their mother and where she's gonna live. Ever since my grandpa passed away, like close to 6 years ago, she has been having problems with where to live. They sold the condo that she was living in (my youngest uncle got married and moved out) and she was kinda displaced, with nowhere to live. The initial plan was to get her a small place, but they scraped that idea because they didn't want to let her live on her own, given her old age. So then they agreed that she'd be a travelling gypsy, and live alternately with each of the six brothers.

Now, usually this would work out if everyone complied and was cooperative. The first three brothers (my dad included), did not go back on their words and offered a place for her to make her home for a few months or so. She did live here and there in the first three brothers' homes, but it wasn't exactly smooth sailing for some. One of the aunties had problems but this wasn't an issue because at least they bothered to offer their places for her to live in. (shan't mention the problems they faced here because they were far too trivial and stupid) The three younger brothers though, aren't really keen on letting her live with them, and it can only get uglier when all six brothers start speaking at the same time...

The point I'm trying to put across is that there really isn't much fun even if you had six kids. Maybe its a gender thing, you know, like how they say the girls will be more accepting of their own parents, whilst the boys will be generally carried away with their own families. But my grandma is damn poor thing lah, like we know she's sick and tired of not being accepted, not being welcomed, and that she's become more or less a burden for her sons.

I really don't know what is going to happen to her now. I hope they find a solution quick, but that'd definitely be before a lot of arguments and raised voices coming from six men who maybe last squabbled at the playground when they were little.

It's quite tragic if you end up like that in old age. Whoever said that having children meant wealth isn't quite right, and that the more kids you had, the better your retirement days will be. Yes, there is plenty of money that can be given to you when you age, but really at the end of the day, where is the love?

Some might ask me why my family would not take her in. For us, its spatial concern. My house only has three rooms, and thats only enough for my parents, myself, and my sister. So that is the reason why we can't take her in long-term.

Another extremely good example I can talk about is that of my mum. My mum has three other siblings, and she's the eldest daughter. Why is it that I think that having less siblings is better for my mum? That is because of an extremely annoying sister my mum has. Even till now, at her age, my mum still feels that her sister is bugging her like 24/7 and she's getting increasingly irritated. At work, at home, over the phone, along Orchard Road, when she's wanting to pee in the bathroom. I'm telling you, my auntie is seriously annoying.

I feel it too. I get so annoyed when she calls like about 254 times a day. And this is especially common when I'm desperately trying to get some sleep and the awful ring tone my house phone has refuses to keep quiet. Her personality is such that she must call for the trivial-est matter, not letting go of any doubts she has, any questions, any queries, anything that's freaking under the sun that she isn't fully aware of.

So that's that. And having too many siblings is such a pain sometimes. I'm just so damn glad I've one single sister who is not annoying at all. (:

Lonely Afternoons and Catnaps

The past few days have been the same for me. Every day I come back from school alone, and after my shower, I'd fall asleep almost immediately. I don't know why but college life is extremely tiring and it'll all accumulate in the late afternoons.

And then I'd wake up sometime between seven or eight o'clock to dinner and the noise of my family members. I think I prefer being home alone actually, because noone can bug me and I won't have to respond to any attempts to interact with me.

Lectures and tutorials have been great so far. I've not had any trouble keeping awake or listening to the teacher and I am glad that I am actually learning things. (: But one thing though, I really detest homework! I've got a difficult 500 word chinese essay waiting for me now, and I'm definitely not looking forward to it. It's like, my chinese has been thrown out of the window already.

Hold Your Tongue

You're nice, but not very nice.

Especially when you made the sharing session seem like such a joke to you. I was enjoying it before you uttered some random thing which, I guess, rattled off your lips and you didn't even know. You know, some words have to pass through the brain before they are spoken, and noone's going to forgive you for shallow responses.

I've said my peace.

Monday, January 15, 2007

My Weekend

Friday
I had floorball trials last Friday after school. It's like the only CCA that I really want to join, because I really don't see myself singing in Meridian's choir and I don't really have any other favourable options too. The trials went well, we played 3 on 3 and I was teamed with two others. We only got to play for the first round, but the senior asked for my name after the game, so I guess I stand a chance! (:
After the trials, I went to meet Taariq and we made our way down to town to meet Karen and Prasanna. It was enjoyable along the way because Taariq was telling me all about his Orientation at Temasek and all the other interesting stuff in his life recently. And we didn't get to meet Pras in the end because she was like on a date and she conveniently decided to just not meet us at all after that. So Taariq and I accompanied Karen, who was trying on clothes at various places, and I managed to buy a Zara tee for just $19.90! (:
We went home on bus 518 after dinner at Pasta Mania's and the three of us were dancing to some oldie track at the back of the bus.

Saturday
I met Karen on Saturday and we went to Queensway and Holland Village to walk around. The initial plan was for her to treat me to n.y.d.c. but we didn't get to do that due to the lack of time. We had kaya toast at ya kun's instead, and we did manage to walk around quite a bit though. Karen bought a damn nice pair of orange Adidas Kid's shoes ; her feet are so small that even the biggest kid's size is too big for her! And she also bought a top for CNY, I don't like her. After that we headed down to Victoria Concert Hall where we watched Adam's band concert, which was really good and enjoyable. (:
After the concert, we sat down by the quay and did something I've never ever done in my life before. I had pig's tongue, finally. Karen took the trouble (she didn't have to, really) to pack some home-cooked pig's tongue for me to try and to let me overcome my fear and disgust of what she claims is a truly delectable dish. I was a bit reluctant at first, but I took a nibble and it was surprisingly good. I realised that you just have to stop thinking its a pig's tongue. And that you can actually see like taste buds, and it's like curly at the tip, and that god-knows-what the pig stuck its tongue into! So with these disturbing thoughts chucked aside, I finished up most of it quickly!

After my Fear Factor moment, we walked down to Clarke Quay and envied the rich and beautiful people who were on their way to the clubs, before finally jumping into a cab and heading towards Geylang for our lunch, dinner and supper. We had the famous black pepper beef hor fun, and we also had orh jian and sweet and sour pork. We really had a lot to eat lah, and we were stuffing ourselves with so much good food.

Sunday
I went to Bugis to meet my OG people, and we took neoprints together. But too bad not everyone was present. I had to hang around town after that before meeting my parents, so Azy accompanied me at Starbucks and we walked around for a bit too. After that I met my family and we went to Golden Mile for steamboat. Ate like a pig again, and was damn contented after that, as usual. (:

Screw Them All

Screw word limits. I don't understand how I can possibly write something of substance and something that'd create a fantastic first impression with only 200 words. I can't even get all my points across, I can't do much really.

Screw 'Message In A Bottle's. I swear I'd never attempt those again. I even have problems shoving the paper into the bottle. Talk about seeking rescue and S.O.S.!

Screw group outings. Draggy, non-exciting, waste of time, tiring and annoying. Perfect for turning up late though.

Screw rainy days. As they only result in wet (and sometimes smelly) jeans and white shoes which end up with blackish stains.

Screw weekends. They only make the weekdays seem so much more dull.

Screw annoying relatives. They get on your nerves like all the time, and they call like 327 times a day for nothing. But un-screw annoying relatives when you hear your parents bitch heartily about 'em. It's worth it, I'm telling you.

Screw non-existent fantasies. Wait, aren't all fantasies non-existent?

Screw age 17. Because its only that bit closer to legal 18, yet you're still under 18, and 17 only makes you sound so much older than 16. Therefore, it serves no purpose and we should just banish age 17 so I don't feel like I'm missing out on a lot.

Wednesday, January 10, 2007

The Mask Has To Go

I've been thinking about a lot of things recently. I think its all because days have been more routine-like and mundane in college life, and I've had more time for unnecessary reflection. Well, to put it as reflection only makes it sound that bit nicer. I've been pondering hard about many many things within the past like, 3 days and I'm not liking this feeling at all.

And to make it hell lot worst, I had such a terrible day yesterday, Tuesday. As expected, the parents weren't exactly helpful to start the day off for me in such a way, and lectures weren't fantastic either. Throughout the course of the day, I got dissed by some people whom I thought wouldn't do so at all, but nevermind, because I shan't take it too seriously. But it sure affected me a little when I heard those words about me. Honesty is brutal, I guess.

And it had to rain at the end of the day, just when I thought that going back to Dunman would be a breath of fresh air, a form of release for me. I got drenched, and I resulted to having to walk to the next bus stop before finally getting a cab.

Many thoughts have been racing through my mind. I kept thinking to myself if I actually fit in where I am now, and about the new people I met and everything. I guess the stupid insecurities caught up with me after all, about adapting and about accepting change and making choices. I'm such a sucker at making decisions for myself, and taking responsibility of what is my own. I just felt like at 17, there'd be far too many things for me to comprehend in such a short time, and things weren't gonna be easy. Especially when its like certain issues cannot just be brushed off easily like before. Its not like that anymore.

But talk about the whole crap about having to fend for myself and stuff. I really don't want to know how. But is it really that bad?

Certain actions that people do and behaviours that they display make me wonder a lot about the childish image that they portray. I'm not certain what is it that they are trying to prove, and its as if they know me so well that they are able to assess me based on what they see and stuff. Ah, and I really dislike judgements, especially empty judgements which don't help a single bit at all.

Maybe its just what happens, and that taking in the surroundings.. its just part and parcel of this entire experience. Someone told me that I had expectations that were too high, and that really set me thinking. So that was all? And what more is there? These were the questions that I find so amusing to answer, because I don't think anyone really knows until the experience is over.

I am one who thrives on portraying myself as who I really am inside and out and I do not see how others can live without doing so. Simply putting on a smiley face to get you through the day is not gonna help. Yes, I am a cheerful person who likes to crack the occasional joke and enjoy myself. But I am unable to get through the day by being someone I am not, being that uber nice character (that some might envision me to be) and doing all that just for show. To leave others with an impression that is nice, positive, and rid them of all doubts they might have about you. I'm not living everyday for others to see, for others to judge me. And worst still, then they decide to indulge in ridiculing you for some shit they think is true. Marvelous.

I haven't really spoken to anyone properly about this, but I guess it's just a personal battle. I also just realised that my own predicament is solely dependent on myself, and not anyone else. But hey, what's better than feeling all alone in this right? Friends might give the occasional motivation and such, but they'd never get it unless they were in this situation.

I don't like it when I have too much time to think. It makes my mind wander off into nowhere, and I always end up feeling all inferior and odd. You could say that I feel stressed, more sick and tired of this. Day in, day out, I think its only gonna get worse. Putting my mind off things will inevitably help, but this is only temporary. It's such a routine that it has become a chore. I go to school feeling a tad optimistic, and then along the way shit happens, but I still try to be/appear happy, I head home, and its almost like the smiles fade, and I sit here alone feeling all grouchy and down, and I realise many things, many things that aren't really very refreshing, and then I try to sleep on it, and the next day arrives.

And I fear.

Monday, January 08, 2007

First Day of College

I have no bloody idea why my parents have to annoy me at the start of a brand new day, and also at the end of this long day at school. Sometimes I just feel that they don't really bother much about sparing a thought about me and my state of mind, and that they have a serious problem reacting correctly and comprehending situations properly. Especially situations which involve me.

School was great today. We spent our free period (the first hour and a half after assembly talk) at the library watching Dumb and Dumberer. It was really stupid but such a great way to start off the school day (which was ruined by my parents already when I left for school that morning). We didn't have time to finish watching the entire movie though, so we'd prolly continue tomorrow, when we have a freakin' long two and a half hour break!

Then we had maths and lit lectures, which were not too bad. I am still extremely sore about having to take maths. And I thought I was so over them bloody calculations lah. We also had choir auditions, and I told the conductor/teacher that I'd think about joining choir. I don't think I wanna continue singing though, would want to try something new now.

I rushed down to Dunman after my choir auditions to help Dunman choir out with choir auditions for the sec ones. And I must say it really made my day because I was so happy to be back in my alma mater :) Nothing beats having all the people you know around you, and just being able to have a great time in their company! It gets really tiring when you're put in this new environment to adapt to and the people are like nice but they don't know you that well enough yet.

Hidayah and I spent dinner with Miss Yeo, and of course it made my day even better because she's always such a joy to be around, with her infectious laughter and jolly spirit. After that, she sent me to Ikea to meet my troublesome parents who wanted the Ikea card that was still in my wallet all because they wanted the loyalty points (fuck that $600++ sofa that y'all didn't buy in the end!) and by then I was already beat and ready to doze off anytime. So we bought a laptop table and freakin' pot coasters (the made-of-cork kind) and no sofa. Damn.

Tomorrow would be a great day to look forward to. I can't wait to spend another day attending lectures in the morning and spending the afternoon with Dunman choir. Let's just hope my parents don't come along and spoil the fun. If not you'd have to endure another one of these tiresome ramblings again.

Atlas 4

That's a picture of my Orientation Group, they are all very nice people!

Lectures will start today (Monday) and I don't know why but I just can't wait! I am really excited and happy that at least now I am gonna study the subjects which I want to study.

Yesterday was great fun :) I went to town with Karen to get her planner and to save myself from boredom. We were walking around, cashless and drooling at nice clothes which had further reductions. I am eyeing this super nice Guess? t-shirt, and I will get it in the coming week as Karen and I arm ourselves with money so that we can buy clothes for Chinese New Year. That, of course, is a very lameass excuse to spend money.

After our browsing through the shops, I left her and went to meet my family at Great World City. I haven't been there in like, 5 or 6 years but I didn't get to walk around anyway. Got there at 8pm, just in time for Pa to treat us to an extremely hearty meal at Jack's Place. I had the Asian Butter Steak and it was really good stuff! I ate a lot (you know, like, until you feel like puking) and then we went home :)

And Pa bought me the John Legend album. I can't wait to enjoy it, real soon. He bought the Happy Feet soundtrack for Cheyenne, and it was so cute just watching her dancing away in That CD Shop.

I think Pa's extremely nice today. But he'd be only two weeks away from jobless. I find it so amusing that the first day he's not working is on my birthday. How coincidental.

Friday, January 05, 2007

Early Celebration

Hello everyone.

The reason I am not updating is because I am so extremely tired. But the bitchings are accumulating inside me and I don't really have anywhere to vent.

I've been at school for the past two days. School is a really foreign word to me now, but I am enjoying it. Somehow, I am really looking forward to the lessons. Zero Science subjects equals to fun fun fun. I'm in the middle of Orientation Camp, and so far I'm quite liking it. Quite only.

The past two days have been rather enjoyable, but I am really digging the new company I have. The new friends who'd eventually become my classmates are really nice, and I can't wait to go to lectures with them and doing crazy things in school.

Its kinda cute lah, how we ended up in the same class. I guess everyone wants to be in that subject combination, and its very cute just because we're all like from different schools. There are no major separations just because there are many many people from a particular school, so that's pretty good lah.

Something really funny happened yesterday. Glendon wrote in this birthday list that the OGLs were passing around that his birthday was today. It's actually not. He got it wrong 'cos he thought that he was supposed to write down today's date in the list. So our very nice OGL went to get a small little cake as a surprise for him, and in the end she got cheated, because its not his birthday today. So my group ended up celebrating the January babies' birthdays, which includes Glendon, Yong En and myself! Haha, so that was a really unexpected and sudden celebration :)

And after that the OGL decided to punish him (for cheating her) by drenching him with two buckets of water at the track. It was quite funny lah.

Aiyah, won't be able to go back to Dunman tomorrow to attend the Sec 1 Orientation Campfire Night because school ends at like 9pm tomorrow. But I really wanna go back though.

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

Tonnes of Photos

I was at New York New York today with my friends. This is almost like our very last time being out together before school starts, with every single person present there. And I was glad (:

P.S. Check out that very last group shot. Edwin's got horns! Its so ironic that these angel wings on the poster actually fit so nicely on his head as horns, lol.